The Ups and Downs of Introductions

Hello!  Hope you are all well.  We are currently midway through the introductions process and I had hoped to write a post each day but there has been a lack of internet access which has made it quite difficult so I'll have to do a quick update about the last few days.

Before I start to talk about what we have been up to this week, I must first tell you about the amazing adoption shower that my family and friends organised for me over the weekend.  It was such a beautiful event and I was really touched by the love that I was shown, and the wonderful presents received!  The most touching part of the whole evening was an idea one of my friends had come up with.  Each lady was given a piece of material and fabric pens.  They were given an opportunity to write a message to DH, me and/or Babygirl.  I was so moved by the messages and look forward to when the pieces are stitched together to make a blanket.  Such a beautiful idea!!! OK - so I've finishing gushing!  It was a beautiful evening and it left me feeling very reflective.  After everyone had gone, I found myself reflecting on the night and the next step ahead.  The adoption shower became extremely symbolic for me and gave me the sense of being sent off into the land of motherhood.

So I was extremely excited on Monday when I woke up ready to face the first day of introductions.  It started with a 2 hour meeting with our SW, Babygirl's SW and the FC in which the terms of placement were agreed and the introductions plan outlined.  It was clear that it was going to be an exciting but also tiring week.  There will be a lot of travelling on our part as well as some overnight stays in a hotel.  Once the meeting had been concluded, DH, myself and the FC set off for FC's home where Babygirl would be waiting.  The drive took about 1 and a half hours and we arrived as Babygirl woke up from her afternoon nap.  She was brought down and for the first time we set eyes on our baby in the flesh - it was a special moment.  She was handed to me immediately and she inspected me closely - you could almost hear her thinking, "Who are you?"  She settled into DH's arms for a short milk feed but did cry everytime she heard FC's voice.  We stayed for about an hour and then headed off to check in at the hotel.  That night, our SW called to see how it went.  We told her that it had all gone smoothly.  I wasn't sure how I was supposed to feel - she didn't feel like she was my child but I knew that it was early days.

Day 2 - we arrived late morning in time to take Babygirl out of her cot after her nap.  We played in her room and the FC was really supportive by making sure that she was absent so that Babygirl depended on us for her needs.  We also had the joy of taking Babygirl to the clinic to be weighed - it was lovely to amongst other parents and fitting in!

Day 3 - we arrived earlier this day and took Babygirl out for lunch.  On this day, we got our first smile and a couple of giggles from Babygirl.  We got to try out our pushchair and I thoroughly enjoyed browsing the shops with my new family! :-) 

Day 4 (today) - we drove back home with the FC and Babygirl following to join us for lunch.  Today was not such a good day - Babygirl was obviously confused and overwhelmed by the presence of the FC and her new parents.  All she wanted was to be in the arms of her FC.  It was tough for us all - Babygirl wanted FC and was not happy unless she was in her arms,  the FC was distressed because she felt that she should leave Babygirl with us to encourage attachment to us, and we were distressed because Babygirl who had loved being with us for the last few days was now screaming continually everytime we held her.  It has left us a little sad today but we know that tomorrow is another day.  Today we were reminded that as happy as we are to start building our family with Babygirl, it is a devastating time for her as she is being taken from all she knows.

Pray for all of us - DH and I, Babygirl and the FC.

Until next time,
Cece
xxx